You know, there are things in life that kinda FORCE you to take a positive outlook. Well, I guess really you always have a choice. So, you can either be super depressed forever, OR you can take a positive outlook. I'm not much for depression, it's too depressing...so, I choose the latter. Anyway, so this past week I have had one of these fun life events.
So, just over a week ago I found out I was pregnant, yes, pregnant. I have an IUD because we decided we didn't want to have anymore kids for a while (especially after my last pregnancy). So, I go to the doctor and they come back and say "Oh, by the way, ur pregnant". How do you respond to this? I kinda laughed at first, thinking it was a joke. And then it set in...I'm WHAT? Wait, how? Well, actually, I kinda know the answer to that question...but I have an IUD. And then the dr goes on to say "We're not sure what to think. We have NEVER had anyone get pregnant on this tyoe of IUD before. The other IUD, yes a few times. But we have been doing this one for a few years now, and you are our first pregnancy". Yay me, even better. Ok, I knew my body was screwed up, seeing as I got pregnant twice while on birth control, and then when I was off they told me I would have as much luck getting pregnant as my hubby would (that was a fun conversation). But seriously, am I that screwed up that I am the ONLY person to get pregnant on this type of IUD?
Anywho...so, they do an ultrasound, and there is no baby. There is the little sac, but they don't see the baby. So, they send me home saying I have very likely miscarried, which didn't surprise me. The IUD causes miscarriage, and the MS meds I'm on cause miscarriage. So, they say go home and take another pregnancy test in a week. If it comes back pregnant we need to do the blood tests. If it comes back not pregnant then the baby is completely gone, and you have definitely miscarried.
Now, it has been a week. And, yes, I miscarried. No big surprise there. But I find it strange. I found out just a little over a week ago, just after I found out I was, I found out I most likely miscarried. But still, somehow, I still got attached to this little baby. Not sure how that happened. So, I decided I need to think about the positive things. So, here are the reasons a miscarriage was best for us at this time...(not saying we're not gonna try again later)
1) Now I have a little more time to focus on getting completely better from my previous MS attack
2) Now I have a little more time to get my MS more stable with the icky shots, and then I can try again :)
3) Now we have more time to focus on getting our baby up to normal pace with speaking, and maybe even potty trained before another baby comes along ;)
well, that's all I can think of right now, but It's good enough for now :)
About Me
- Tambi
- I married my High School Sweetheart, Erek, in May 2003. Shortly after we were surprised with a pregnancy, which ended up giving us a VERY handsome baby boy, Braedyn, in June 2004. A short couple years later, Braedyn graduated college with me from the now UVU, when I got my BS in BS (ok, a Bachelor of Science in Behavioral Science, but that just sounds so much cooler). A while later we were blessed with another amazing, and yet again handsome baby boy, Brock, in October 2007. Erek and I both work full-time. Erek works for Salt Lake County Parks & Rec, and I work from home for the best online University in the WORLD (Western Governors University). And after almost 6 years of marriage, we are still madly in love!
Braedyn
Braedyn is our little 4-year-old smarty. He is super smart, and loves to read (as you can see in this picture). He is super excited to be going to Kindergaten next year and finally be in the big kid school. and he HATES when I tell him he's my baby.
Brock
Brock is our little mischievous daredevil. He is very active, and loves going off of high things head first. He definitely keeps me on my toes. And he is still okay with me calling him my baby :)
Whether you want one or "are ready" for another one or not, a miscarriage is scary, sad, and emotionally draining. I'm so sorry you had to go through ALL of that emotion in one week! Best of luck with all that comes. :)
ReplyDeleteoh tamby i am so sorry. I hope you feel better.
ReplyDeleteI had a misscarrage before i had allee and i thought i was goin to die. I had the same problem a sac with no baby and i i had to have a lovey d and c..But the int of the story is my daddy told me after i had the d&c if you have to lose a baby that sometimes its better lose one before it born then after ( i know it sounds terrable) but if you think about it, it it is some what comforting in a small mynunt way..
I hope you get feeling better:)
Oh Tambi-I am so sorry. My eyes are all teary now. I wouldn't wish a miscarriage on anyone-they are so tough-no mater how far along you were. You are such a trooper-I love your positive attitute and how you try to look at the bright side of everything. Please let me know if you want/need to talk! I miss you!!
ReplyDeleteTambi, I'm so sorry! I know what you mean though, it doesn't take long to get attached, even if you're not planning on, or even wanting to be pregnant. I had an ovarian pregnancy a little over 2 years ago, and even though I was only 7 weeks along when they discovered it, it was very hard to find out that the baby would never be born.
ReplyDeleteI really admire your positive attitude - you really are an inspiration to me! I'm glad that we've been able to get back in contact!
I had no idea Tambi! I am so VERY sorry to hear that. I hope you are feeling better physically and with time I pray you will feel better emotionally. Your outlook is inspiring though. Take care. Love to you and the family!!!!!
ReplyDelete